Your friends will try to sabotage your sobriety. I learned this fact the hard way. If you are thinking about getting sober or not drinking or even just taking a break, I didn’t expect that my friends would try to sabotage my efforts.
A few weeks ago, I talked about my sobriety journey, which I was scared to do. It’s uncomfortable discussing it because it’s not fun to share with the world that you were a disaster. But after sharing that, seeing the support in the comments was inspiring. Also, it was inspiring to see each other’s support. I didn’t expect it, and it choked me up.
However, some comments, posts, and questions need to be addressed, so I want to talk a bit about those. I also want to share more about getting sober and things to know.
Not being able to keep it under control.
At the time, I didn’t think that I had a raging alcohol problem. I didn’t realize it because I was choosing not to. There were warning signs that I was having a problem with alcohol. I want to share some of those bigger ones.
I do drink alcohol currently. I drink a couple times a week, perhaps a few glasses of wine once or twice weekly. I control my drinking. A comment in one of the videos said that I’m not sober because I drink. I am not doing self-destructive things that I used to do, and I’m able to enjoy alcohol responsibly.
If you’re somebody who can’t get it under control or you can’t drink because it takes you right back into where you work, you probably shouldn’t drink alcohol. I recommend a 12-step program, which I went to AA when I was in college after a couple of serious and intense situations directly related to alcohol abuse.
What to be prepared for when getting sober
Friends will try to sabotage your efforts. The reason is simple: they don’t have your best interest in mind. When you make a lifestyle shift and choose your future instead of self-destructive behaviors, your friends will feel uncomfortable.
It’s not fun hanging out with drunk people. When you’re sober, being around a bunch of drunk people can be miserable. You start questioning how you acted that stupid.
You’ll have to change what you’re doing. A lot of people think when they get sober or choose not to drink that, they’re going to do the same things they’ve always been doing but not drink. But you must recondition and rewire your brain. You need to change your behaviors. Drinking will lose its allure and fun. People that you thought were such great friends are disasters. And if you want to move forward with your life and sobriety truly, you need to make these changes to be a better person.
You didn’t realize there’s a better life. I didn’t know that there was a better life when I was doing self-destructive things because I didn’t understand what the options were. I didn’t realize the fantastic potential for myself and my mind. I didn’t understand what was on the other side of sobriety or not abusing alcohol.
You have to push past the first three months. If you’re thinking about getting sober and not drinking, get past the first three months, and then your life will look wildly different. You will look and feel better, your relationships will improve, and your self-esteem will skyrocket.
Don’t start talking about it to everyone. When giving up alcohol, don’t start talking about it to everyone. Don’t brag, post, or scream it from the rooftops. Nobody wants to hear about it. It’s your journey, and living well is the best way to show what you’re going through. When you boast or preach, a lot of people tune you out. Many people find it annoying or obnoxious; some are sick and tired of it.
Some people won’t be ready for it. Many people know you as someone different, and when you start to evolve, some aren’t ready for it. When you begin to change, some people won’t want you to succeed and be a better person. It’s shining the light or turning the mirror back on themselves. That’s uncomfortable for them.
You’ll have to find new hobbies. Find new sources of recreation. No amount of drinking or partying can outweigh the benefits and beauty of having a clear mind, being spiritually whole, and being connected to those who genuinely love you and want the best for you.
