This guy came flying down some stairs, trying to shotgun a beer using a plastic knife. Then, he threw the unopened beer across the room while simultaneously passing out. It was his birthday (and we were in our 20s), so no one minded except the guy who got hit in the head with a full beer.
Gentlemen, it’s the holiday season filled with holiday events, gatherings, and parties. And I don’t want you acting like Mr. Shotgun Guy. Before I continue with this newsletter, I want to know — what type of guest are you at parties? How you conduct yourself at these events can truly have a lasting impression on how others view you and relate with you in the future.
Which holiday party-goer are you?
- No Show — Every host’s worst nightmare is the one person who commits and then later bails on the party.
- Party D-bag — You know the one. He arrives in a tacky Christmas suit with the mission to get as many sassy senorita’s phone numbers as possible.
- Drunk Santa — For the first hour or so, he’s spirited, exuberant, and fun. Then he channels his inner Willie T. Soke (aka Billy Bob) when he passes out. By the night’s end, everybody talks about the crazy things he did during the party.
- Grinch — The Grinch groans when it’s time for the Secret Santa exchange and is way too cool to belt out some Christmas carols with the rest of the party-goers. He’s a real downer.
- Romantic — This single dude is tenderhearted and hates being alone during the holidays. He brings his despondency, hoping that he will find someone to reenact the lyrics of “Baby It’s Cold Outside.”
- Wallflower—In some cases, the shy one is only friends with one guest, most likely the host, whom he follows around the party. He can attend the whole party without being noticed.
- Hog — This muncher acts like he’s never seen food before and makes quick friends with all of the food & beverages available. He makes a pig of himself throughout the party.
So, which one are you? I hope none of them. My hope is you are this party goer– the Gracious Guest. Part of being a gracious guest starts before the party even begins. RSVP so the host doesn’t think you’re blowing them off. And never bring someone with you unless you are absolutely certain a plus-one is welcome. You don’t want to put the host in an uncomfortable position.
As a viewer of my videos, you know it’s better to dress up than dress down. In this case, being the great guest you are, dress slightly better than you planned. So, if the dress code is casual, go one step up. It’s better to be a bit more dressed up than feel awkward for being the only one in jeans at a ‘dresses and dress shirt’ party.
Prior planning is the next key. Grab a snack before you leave, as you don’t want to arrive on an empty stomach (for several reasons). NEVER arrive early as you may catch the host off-guard (getting dressed, perhaps). Not a good look. Also, being precisely on time is not what you do. Arrive no later than 30-minutes after the party starts.
Regardless of what party-goer type you are, never show up empty-handed to your holiday affair. That’s right — ALWAYS bring a host gift. Bring something to show that you appreciate all of the work that went into the event and thank them for inviting you to their home, event, or party.
For me, my go-to host gift is a nice bottle of wine. It’s simple, easy, and doesn’t cost much— it’s something nice that typically everyone appreciates. Who doesn’t love a good bottle of wine, right? Now, if you want to take it a little bit further than just showing up with a bottle, put it in a cheerful wine gift bag. These bags cost around a dollar, and they’re a great way to boost the gift a notch higher by making it just a little nicer.
After you arrive at the party, nurse your drink. Don’t want to get wasted and make an ass of yourself. Also, carry your drink in your left hand, so you have your right hand free to shake hands. Make an effort to meet new people by making the first and introducing yourself. As a great party guest, keep small talk light, having a few stories planned to share. Don’t talk only about yourself, don’t network (it’s not the time or place), and make eye contact.
Sure, take pictures, but don’t immediately post them to social media. The time you would spend posting to social media is better spent with the people at the actual party. After taking a few fun pix, stick your phone into your pocket and be present. Speaking of being engaged and present, maintain a ‘happy face’ even if you aren’t thoroughly entertained. Sing and have fun — and since you’re not sloppy drunk, you won’t be judged for your Christmas caroling.
When you say goodbye, thank the host. You wouldn’t believe how many people ghost by leaving without saying ‘goodbye’ or ‘thank you.’ Both are easy to do, gestures that can mean so much. You even take it up a notch by sending a ‘thank you’ note after the party, expressing gratitude to the host for their efforts. You are this gracious guest, right? I knew it! Now, go out and have (safe) festive fun this holiday season.
